It’s Almost Like the New York Times Doesn’t Want Trump To Win

February 27, 2016

Writing Trump to Defeat
(Via the New York Times)

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Today in Completely Ludicrous Headlines

December 18, 2008

cnnkidscancer


This Son-Of-A-Something, That’s For Sure

August 8, 2008

“Edwards made a point of telling Woodruff that his wife’s cancer was in remission when he began the affair with Hunter. Elizabeth Edwards has since been diagnosed with an incurable form of the disease.” [ABC News]

Why yes, of course, Senator John Edwards! You’re perfectly right! In fact, we really ought to be acknowledging the forethought and kindness with which you scheduled your affair with this sketchtastic, kind of skanky-looking lady, whom you then allegedly passed along to your former campaign finance director, Andrew Young, who then—just in time!—apparently impregnated her.

It’s a good thing you waited till after Elizabeth Edwards’ cancer was in remission to start fucking around. Jesus, otherwise, we all might really have thought you were a lowdown, hypocritical, narcissistic lying pietist, which couldn’t possibly be true, given concessionary remarks such as these:

“We, as citizens and as a government, have a moral responsibility to each other, and what we do together matters. We must do better, if we want to live up to the great promise of this country that we all love so much…I want to thank everyone who has worked so hard—all those who have volunteered, my dedicated campaign staff who have worked absolutely tirelessly in this campaign.”

Yeah, hey, especially that Andy Young over there. Dedicated volunteer indeed. Let’s hope for his sake (and it looks likely) that his volunteerism is the mercenary kind.